Back in the long, dark and distant past, I used to visit Trowbridge. In those days, pubs sold only the beers that were made by the company that owned them. Consequently, the pubs in Trowbridge were in trouble.
You had three choices, you could brave the horrors of rough cider which tastes like a 50/50 mix of hydrazine and unsymmetrical dimethylhydrazine.
Or you could try Wadworth's, which is a bit like drinking slightly flat, slightly warm, carbonated marmite (which has been diluted with stagnant pond water).
Then there was Usher's.
Usher's was the least palatable choice of the three.
It was not good.
In 2000 the brewery closed down and was dismantled on site in a matter of weeks by a team of North Koreans and
British engineers. It was shipped over to North Korea and was up and
running 18 months later.
It now brews the "Pride of Pyongyang".
I have a theory as to why this has happened. You remember a couple of years back George W Bush named North Korea as one of the 'axis of evil' nations? I reckon closing down the Usher's brewery, moving it from Trowbridge to Pyongyang and then starting up the brewing again is a CIA plot to poison this last bastion of Communism into surrender.
Given the choice of having to drink a pint of Ushers or be waterboarded, I'd go with the waterboarding.
Mind you, The Dear Leader has retaliated. They've used their evil communist ways to pose an even greater threat to the hapless populous of Trowbridge. Yep, they've made Peewee open a new pub.
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